I hate it...

I hate what its done to me... I hate that it exists... I hate having had it and I hate wanting it..

its a terrible thing.... But GOD do i love it so..

I cant contain myself sometimes, and Ive come to hate myself tonight...because i realized Im just as selfish as all the men I mock on a daily bases...

...What a cruel euphoric disease sex is...
I want to forget about it, i want to never have it.. (oh but do i want it so...)

Im sorry Sunshine, I truly am... And if i thought i could, and that you would agree, i would pronouce celibacy... But i dont think i have that much of a will

Sure, when i had my V card, i could have a relationship without the thought of sex ever pop into my mind...

But now, its so hard....
so very hard... I cant take it sometimes... its a terrible thing...

I hate it... I want it to go away...

I love it, and i dont want to live without it.. see the problem?

Its nothing but a nuisence, a disease....

But god...is it good..